In The Beginning…

I’m a 60-something woman who has spent a lifetime journaling. My journals explore trauma, relationships, and how my childhood shaped me. I’ve written about difficult truths—without sugarcoating. Encouraged by my therapist and significant other, I’ve decided to turn these reflections into a blog.

So… who am I?

I was born and raised in the Midwest, in a small farming community, though we lived in town. I was adopted, something never kept a secret. (When I mention my parents, I mean my adoptive mother and father unless otherwise noted.)

My childhood was happy. I played outside from morning until the streetlights came on. It was the 1960s—tomatoes from the garden, blackberry-stained fingers, and scraped knees. Summers were spent in the pool; winters in snow forts. We had little money, but I never noticed. I had everything I needed—kindness, values, and love. It was the only childhood I knew, so I assumed everyone’s was the same.

Religion was central to my upbringing, but I never felt I had a choice. Being Mormon was all I knew, but as I got older, I felt stifled. My friends had freedoms I didn’t. I began to notice differences in their lives and mine.

My father was my anchor—kind and loving. My relationship with my mother, however, was difficult. When my father passed away when I was 14, life with her became tumultuous. But didn’t all teenagers struggle with their mothers?

As I grew older, I realized my experiences weren’t universal. I was disciplined with a heavy hand—harsh words, hitting, punishments beyond normal. At the time, I thought it was just how things were.

Only years later did I understand: I had endured trauma. Physical. Emotional. Verbal. And it profoundly shaped who I became.

So, what is this blog about? I plan to share openly—some of it raw, some uncomfortable, but all real. My hope is that my journey resonates with someone. That by sharing my struggles and the hard work of healing, I might give even one person hope. You are not defined by your past. You can heal. You can be happy.

Healing takes effort—therapy, journaling, and honesty. But it’s worth it. You will get out of it what you put in.

So that’s a bit about me. But that was nearly 50 years ago. What’s happened since?

Stay tuned—I have more to share.

Be well.